This poem is taken from PN Review 251, Volume 46 Number 3, January - February 2020.
The Year of Grey and other poems
The Year of Grey
For Stephanie
The year of grey started with an elephant
I had been ignoring, in the corner of my room
blowing his trumpet till I could no longer ignore him.
I fed him carrots, beef stew leftovers
& sandwiches I stole from other people’s bags.
I could no longer pretend he wasn’t there
& that I didn’t love or want him,
more that I wanted breath in my lungs.
The Rape Scene
How do you tell someone that they have been living
in the wrong house. That a home is not somewhere
you are scared to be and that not all men lie, use
and abuse. One day you will learn
that how you grew up was not like everyone else
and that there was never anything you could do.
...
For Stephanie
The year of grey started with an elephant
I had been ignoring, in the corner of my room
blowing his trumpet till I could no longer ignore him.
I fed him carrots, beef stew leftovers
& sandwiches I stole from other people’s bags.
I could no longer pretend he wasn’t there
& that I didn’t love or want him,
more that I wanted breath in my lungs.
The Rape Scene
How do you tell someone that they have been living
in the wrong house. That a home is not somewhere
you are scared to be and that not all men lie, use
and abuse. One day you will learn
that how you grew up was not like everyone else
and that there was never anything you could do.
...
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